Oh ! My God Story NO. 54

In America, you can't make yourself understood if you are humble.

"This is nothing but please keep it."
"This isn't great but please eat it if you don't mind."
Americans get confused if you say things like this.

Why does this man try to give me such a terrible thing?
I'm offended.

Americans will go like this when they give something.
"This is delicious and I want you try."
This is the American way of gift giving.
It's important to say what you think straightforwardly in America.

Japanese are humble and I like that very much.
But Americans don't understand that.

"This is my silly wife."
If you say something like this,

you will be sued for maltreatment of your wife.

Oh ! My God.

understand =理解する  can't make yourself understood =通じない 
"This is nothing but please keep it."=「これ、粗末なものですがどうぞ」
This isn't great =これ、大したものではないんですが・・・  eat=食べる
if you don't mind=もし良かったら  get confused=困惑する、変な顔をする
like this=このような  Why=何故  a terrible thing=ヒドイもの
try to give =与えることを試みる、くれようとする
be offended:=侮辱される、失礼だと思う  I'm offended=失礼ではないか!
will go like this =この様にやる(言う)でしょう 
I want you try=どうぞ召し上がってください  
the American way =アメリカ人のやり方  of gift giving=贈り物の
important=重要、大切  think=考える   straightforwardly=:率直に
"This is my silly wife."=「これ愚妻ですが・・」
be sued =訴えられる  maltreatment=虐待すること、乱暴に扱うこと
for maltreatment of your wife=妻虐待で   wife=妻